This Plan Will Take So Long

Why? There are 3 reasons I can give you.

First, I seem to have perfected my nature as a lazy old bloke. I’ve been very lazy for so long. When an idea struck me, I’d get very excited. I’d lay out a plan as good as I can. Take lots of cold baths and keep planning good. When satisfied, laziness takes over. I procrastinate and I delude myself that I’ve been doing something, anything just to have something transported to my brain that I’ve been busy. Very busy. So that I’d have a good excuse that I deserve a good drink or two. And I succeeded kidding myself. Every single fricking day.

Hours become days become weeks, and now it’s been a month since I have that plan. Poor good plan.

Second, well, this is a good excuse. But I digress. I’ve been working hard as a regular 10 to 7 ratracer. I work in a call center company here in Cebu. And it’s a good company. I’m working with some great people. And I have nothing but good things to say to them. And like them we are regular ratracers, working for someone’s big dreams. And that someone is very lucky to have us helping him actualize his big dreams. Good for him. He’s very lucky indeed.

Third, I lack motivation. I am single. Which means no big responsibilities. So I suppose I should just enjoy my time and don’t have to work hard. Which is very wrong whichever way you look at it. Well, I still have my family helping paying the bills and putting food on the table, and I pay my lil brother’s tuition and allowance. But no real motivation. Punch me in the crotch when you see me. That should motivate me to at least hate you and try to be better than you.

Thing is: I am still holding on, on that same idea. Someday I’ll break that old bad habit. Kicking the big bad wolf. Someday I’ll soon get tired of giving excuses. Someday I’ll find myself a good motivation.